My Redemption Story: How Jesus Changed My Life
Testimonies are powerful.
Take it from any ad or any influencer video that makes its way onto your phone’s screen today… stories give relatable illustrations of transformation.
People are so relational, and we love to hear how realities have touched down in the lives of others. These words of Revelation come as no surprise:
“They triumphed over [the accuser] by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony…”Revelation 12:11 NIV
The assaulter of human souls and deceiver of minds (aka The Enemy) has been defeated and is undergoing defeat. He has been obliterated by “the blood of the lamb”, also known as Christ’s sacrificial death on the cross. And he is continually triumphed over by real people sharing their real stories of who Jesus is and what he has done.
Christians are witnesses of who Jesus is, and the freedom he brings—actual witnesses in the sense that we have seen our own lives (and the lives of others) transformed.
I love that verse above, and I think it’s so powerful. And I don’t know about you, but nothing strikes me straight to the heart more than hearing somebody’s testimony of who Jesus is to them personally and how their lives have been changes by knowing him.
So, without further adieu, I’d love to share a snippet of my own story.
To share a bit of my faith story and why I have chosen to trust in Jesus, I will be answering three simple questions:
What was your life like before Jesus?
What circumstances led you to give your life to Jesus?
What does your life look like after Jesus?
I hope this snapshot of my life and faith encourages you in your own journey. I hope you’re able to gain a glimpse into the goodness of God, and that if you haven’t yet given your life to Jesus, that you might be prompted to “taste and see” for yourself that He is good.
Finally, before I dive in, here, and at the end of this document, there is an opportunity for you to share your own redemption/faith story.
What was your life like before Jesus?
Growing up, there is a lot about life that I have to be thankful for. I experienced love from others and while my life didn’t always feel stable, I had friends and family members to talk through things with. It seems like I always had an awareness of God—through things like Awana (Wednesday night groups)—or overhearing adults talking. I don’t remember ever not believing in God. But I’ll tell you that there is a big difference between believing God is real, and actually knowing the person of Jesus and receiving the gifts he offers.
I remember carrying a heavy sadness with me, even from a young age. I remember telling my mom, “I just feel so sad sometimes and I don’t know why". I was a tender-hearted little girl—one who loved to think and draw and connect with others—but who carried so much pain.
I cared a lot about pleasing other people. And of course it’s not bad to want other people to be happy—that’s great! But… the way I cared about pleasing people was actually really harmful to myself. I had no sense of my own worth, and when I did do things to make other people happy, I was puffed up with pride in a way that I would now consider harmful. When I didn’t… I completely crumbled inside.
All of this people pleasing, and just a heaviness of heart overall, led me in and out of bouts of depression. I was learning more and more about God through bible studies and other events as I grew to be college-aged, but this feeling of never being good enough burdened me.
I hated my own sadness. I just wanted to be happy. I hated the times I would hurt people. I just wanted to be good. I might not have used language this strong at the time, but what I experienced was a lot of self-loathing. I didn’t have any sense of offering value to the world, and my own shortcomings weighed my heart down in a way that felt unbearable at times.
What circumstances led you to give your life to Jesus?
Before I truly understood the love of Jesus, there were a lot of moments that my own pain and self-hatred caused me to offer my life to God… in a way. I certainly wanted God to come in and make me better. I liked learning about him and all… but there is a particular moment that I remember realizing that this faith wasn’t about God making me better as much as it was about receiving his love and care and help when I was still in a pit of struggle.
I remember being at a Young Life camp; I was actually there serving people younger than me, ironically. I was maybe already “saved” in the sense that I knew myself to be a sinner and trusted I’d go to heaven because of what I’d heard Jesus did for me. I was already following God in the sense that I read my Bible and wanted to do what God said was good.
But this knowledge I had in my head sunk deep into my heart when I was sitting in the crowd at this camp, wanting to curl up into a ball and hide. I was so depressed.
I had been at a square dance just hours before thinking about how I smiled outwardly to the world but inwardly, I was just a huge pile of pain. I looked at others dancing and laughing and I hated that I couldn’t escape my own pain and the sadness I carried with me.
What changed everything for me, came next. I was sitting in the crowd, waiting for a talk. The man speaking (shout out to Tim Stanley!) put a picture of mask on the screen. He said “Jesus doesn’t see your mask”. That image cut me to the core; I felt like I had been wearing a mask to the world. (This was pre-covid… so not that kind of mask but the mask that theater people wear to pretend to be someone they aren't.) I feel like I lived my whole life trying to hide my own pain.
He then proceeded to tell story after story of Jesus. Times that Jesus saw and heard the hurting people. He cared about their pain. He didn’t see the facade the rest of the world saw. He saw me in trueness—and he LOVED me.
That truth changed me. For the first time, I felt like Jesus was a real person, who cared about my pain. I understood that he died on the cross to rescue us from sin—the sin (or brokenness wrecking my life) was depression. I wanted to receive this salvation he offered. I believed in who Jesus was to me personally. It changed everything.
I realized faith was more than a factory to make me good. I had the opportunity to be loved by Jesus, to entrust myself to one who cared for me.
I walked away from that place differently. Lighter. My heart was healed by a knowledge of who he was. (And I don’t say that lightly because I know depression is complicated and if we could talk all day, I’d share with you how, although this was a huge healing moment, it was also just the beginning of a journey towards joy that Jesus was taking me on…)
In many ways, he healed me in a moment by understanding his love. In other ways, the healing journey was just beginning.
What does your life look like after Jesus?
Knowing the love of Jesus changed everything for me. My faith became not just something I learned and had to apply, but it because a real relationship with a real Savior who cared for me.
My life is completely different. Slowly, over the years, Jesus has invited me to “remove my mask”. This has meant beckoning me out of hiding and, in his love, sharing my true self with the world. I have a security in his love that I’ve never known in my life.
He’s so alive and present in my life. Like, praying for example. When I come across something hard, I get to go to him—remembering his caring heart—and ask for help. I trust him—again, because I know his caring heart—that he will address my concerns in the best way possible.
The “God stories” that happen are literally innumerable. Occurrences of feeling prompted in my heart to share a word or message with someone—and watching their face burst into tears... Or about provision showing up at just the right time in unexpected ways. God is MOVING, and I get to see it all the time. I even get to be a part of it. Praise him!
I have a deep desire to choose his ways—not because I have to, but because I want to. Because I know his love and I trust his intentions for me.
I feel like the childhood dreams of “Little Annalisa” are coming to be—only because of HIM. And I don’t even count on that! Like, it’s not even the point… I could live my whole life only having Jesus and that would be enough. He fills my heart up that much. And, yet, as if in a big BONUS move, he is continually reminding me of who he has made me to be, of the desires he has written in my heart, and I get to see him bring them to fruition.
I would never publicly share a single piece of artwork if it weren’t for Jesus in my life, affirming and guiding me.
I would never offer a single piece of writing, if it weren’t for him giving me a sense of his love for the world and enabling me to do so.
And I certainly wouldn’t be sharing this testimony, if he hadn’t called me out of hiding so many times.
Jesus has colored my life with love and purpose. Joy is so present. And in hard times, I have the unshakable hope—of truth about him and the promise of eternal life in heaven—that covered me with a deep hopefulness that carries me through the times I can’t see what he’s doing.
On the outside, I’ve probably experienced way harder circumstances since following Jesus. And yet life has been better. Because honestly—Jesus has gotten to the root of my pain. What I needed wasn’t easy life circumstances… what I needed was a deep sense of being loved and having purpose.
He has given me all that and more. And I am so grateful. Thanks for reading!
To share your own redemption story, click below!
